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Comet orbits prone to hyperbole

KUIPER CITY – Every single comet that has ever been observed from Earth travels on a path that starts a kabillion miles away and passes by the sun under pressures that would crush a tank.

“They pass within three feet of the sun’s surface. Any infant knows this,” said cometologist Bud Tasling of IFSOHO, the Institute for the Study of Objects with Hyperbolic Orbits. “You could be sixteen miles underground and feel the tug of those G-forces going by.”

Others at the institute echo Tasling’s sentiment, adding that comets are cold enough to unfry bacon and faster than body odor in an elevator.

One Comment

  1. Anonymous Anonymous July 21, 2008

    don’t even need to read the article. title very funny. -Chuck

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