MULTIVERSE LOCAL 434S – A transmission from an alternate reality heretofore unknown to science implored our current civilization to curtail the transportation of socks into its realm.
“We recognize the necessity to launder all of your vestments, including socks,” said the message in terse and surprisingly fluid English. “But will you please find a way to clean them without, as you say, ‘beaming’ them to us. It seems to be a design flaw in either your washers or dryers.”
Harmonic Convergence consultant and part-time pizza delivery specialist Mike Norcut received the message through the fillings in his teeth, at the house near Sedona, Arizona where his temporal body resides.
“They’ve got the ability to contact and visit us, but they’ve been real busy lately,” said Norcut. “They really want us to work on the sock thing, though.”
UPDATE: A recent finding might provide answers as to where some of the socks end up.