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Not pictured: Driver chatting with survey taker

Poll: 1 in 3 drivers unaware light has turned green

RESEDA – An informal survey of drivers at the intersection of 25th Street and Murphy Avenue reveals that at least 33% of motorists present are not cognizant of the status change in the nearest traffic signal.

The light had changed to green and went unnoticed for upwards of four seconds, half the time of the light’s cycle. Observers had time to conduct the study as the motorist or motorists in question sat idle for several seconds before being gently reminded by another motorist’s horn. The driver then edged haltingly forward and activated the left turn signal, waiting for an oncoming car to complete its right turn before gradually accelerating through the intersection to complete the turn.

Upon phase change to yellow and red, three cars that otherwise might have cleared the signal got stranded and were compelled to wait for the next cycle. Several comments were directed by those motorists in the direction of the first, but it is not known whether those words were heard or heeded.

Theories as to the driver’s negligence vary. Some witnesses proposed that the driver had a momentary lapse of awareness brought about by unrelated events such as reaching for a napkin in the glove compartment or checking social media on a mobile device. Others suggested that dementia or drug abuse might be at the root of the problem. All were in agreement that the driver should be deprived of a license and flogged in public.

Followers of traffic in the area predict that this incident is not isolated, and will in fact be repeated numerous times throughout the course of human history as long as they continue to operate vehicles.

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