Press "Enter" to skip to content
Useless crap is a huge industry, accounting for about 85% of everything.

Recycling hurts useless crap industry

GATLINBURG – Members of the Bauble Manufacturer’s Association, or “Big Useless Crap” met this weekend to confront the most serious challenge facing their industry, recycling.

Makers of trinkets, baubles, tchotchkes, doodads, knickknacks, cheap knockoffs and other products notable for their worthlessness or disposability are protesting the rising influence of recyclable materials.

“The propagation of higher-quality plastics and metals will put undue stress on companies that produce things that looked great on TV or at the checkout counter, but fizzled on or before first use,” said Sal Damons, spokesperson for BMA. “Reprocessing of old materials has at its heart the prevention of waste, and that is counter to all we represent. Our worry is that there will be reduced availability of new materials dug out of the ground.”

To illustrate his point, Damons cites the economics of recycling. “If you have some leftover stuff, and I pay you for it, that’s a resource. If you have to pay me to take it away, that’s garbage. We put the slogan on a key fob.”

One Comment

  1. Kurt Kurt April 23, 2008

    Dude, your ruined earth day!

Comments, Complaints, Recipes